Namaste My Ass

Ever since Angela's birth, I have been experiencing pretty frequent back and hip pain. At times, the pains are so sharp they cause me to catch my breath. During a routine physical with my doctor, I spoke with her about these newfound aches and pains. Apparently, what I am experiencing is common for post partum women. We are more prone to injury in these areas for a variety of reasons. Additionally, the c-section I had this time around further compromised my core strength. The doctor recommended cardio and exercises to strengthen my core and back. As she spoke, the word "yoga" popped into my mind.

I was not surprised by my mind's solution for curing my aches and pains. I enjoy yoga. I find it profoundly relaxes me and makes me feel great about my body. I like its noncompetitive philosophy and its stress on body acceptance. When I was in my early twenties, I belonged to a yoga studio and learned how to properly do the postures. Eventually work responsibilities made me leave the studio, but I continued to enjoy yoga classes at my gym. Unfortunately, after Alice's birth, yoga fell out of my life. I still went to the gym, but my gym times were dictated by Alice's nap schedule which did not correspond with the yoga classes offered.

This week I started on my back/hip pain solution plan. As per my plan, I would go to the gym and do cardio three days a week and on my off days I would do yoga at home. I picked up some new yoga DVDs from my local library and proceeded to rejoin the world of yoga. My initiation has been pretty hilarious. I don't think the founders of yoga anticipated practicing with a three year old, an eight month old, and a pug underfoot. Here is the breakdown of the degeneration of my quest for inner peace and flexibility:

• The DVD started with breathing exercises to center self. To do these exercises I needed to be prone on my yoga mat. First, I had to fight for position on my yoga mat as Alice decided to "play yoga" with me.
  
• Once Alice and I established our territory, I tried to focus on the instructor's directions. This was difficult due to persistent snoring in my left ear. The pug, curious as to why I was laying down on the floor, came to investigate. Since ears are a fetish for her, I then had to spend a few minutes pushing off a pug who decided to lavish my ear with amorous attentions. Angela thought this was hysterical and proceeded to bounce in her bouncer with such intensity that I thought she would shoot out of the thing.
  

• During a forward bend on my left side, I forgot about Angela's grabby arms. She, however, was on the alert and seized my hair as my head sunk downward. I missed a few poses as I gently extricated myself from baby death grip.
  

• A brief glance downward while in tree pose revealed a pug planted at my feet begging for a belly rub.
  

• Downward dog for me meant upward dog for pug as she gave me kisses.
  

• The funniest moment, however, came as I moved out of a forward bend. I looked up to check the screen for the next posture only to find myself face to face with Alice's naked butt. Apparently, the light that salutes me comes from a full moon.
  

Namaste