Not My Own Anymore

About a week ago, I was in the bathroom attending to business when Alice walked in. While I sat there, she began to itemize my body parts: Mommy's hair, Mommy's eyes and so forth. I was impressed with her recognition of all the body parts until she got to my breasts. Those she said were, "Angela's boobies." Come to think of it, she is technically right (at least for now). Note to self: remind Angela that they are loaners.

I Don't Think Miss Manners Would Approve

I have been working with Alice on her manners. I have to admit I am really pleased with her progress (if only we could extend her success to potty training but that is another post/therapy session). She says "thank you" frequently and "I'm sorry" or "Excuse me" in the appropriate contexts. There have been some difficulties with "please" however. I realize that "please" runs counter to the toddler mindset of "Gimme" and "Mine". Still, my parents were sticklers for manners, and the apple does not fall far from the proverbial tree in this respect. Lately I have been gently reminding Alice of the "extra word" she needs when she requests (read: demands)something. She is doing much better but yesterday I had to ruefully laugh at another instance of toddler logic.

I took the girls to see my parents yesterday. I try to go see them once a week. I enjoy their company and the girls love visiting with them. Alice was happily eating her animal crackers snack and had run out of milk. She imperiously demanded, "More milk." I told Alice to remember that extra word she needed to say. She then amended her request to: "More milk, Grandma." Got to love how their minds work.

Words that Bug Me

Sometimes new trends in language just irritate me. I realize I tend to over think the nuances of words and phrases. Old habits die hard and I was a former English teacher. Although I enjoy celebrity gossip as much as the next girl (my favorite guilty pleasure is The Superficial web site), I hate how celebrity press feels the compulsion to create a one word name for famous couples. TomKat, Bradgelina, and so forth. It annoys the heck out of me. Yes, by getting married you do become a united couple and you are tied together, but do we really have to highlight that by creating a name for the couple? Whatever happened to the idea of maintaining a sense of self in marriage? Besides annoying me, the whole joined name sounds like a weird space alien fusion project. It might make a cool movie though. Godzilla Takes On JonKate Plus Their Eight. Perhaps that is why so many celebrities divorce. They want their name back. Then again, maybe my annoyance is really jealousy because I would not have a cool celebrity marriage name. The combination of Maura and John would create something that sounds like "Moron" which is not very flattering now is it?

The latest language irritation is the word "staycation". Why do we need a word for remaining home on a vacation? Is it to make it sound more exotic or something? John and I are staying home when he takes off in August. I am looking forward to it. It means I do not have to pack up every object that we own (and you need them when travelling with small children). I do not have to fight traffic to get to my destination as I am already there. I know where all the good restaurants are for an adult meal and where I can get excellent food in under an hour. This is the same place where hyper toddlers and screaming newborns are welcome. I do not have to stay in a room with my entire family since we have a whole house. I am within driving distance of the beach, amusement parks, theater, museums, gardens, and whatever else takes my fancy. I plan on letting the dust bunnies relax, swimming in the pool, playing with the kids and reconnecting with my hubby. I do not feel deprived that I am not going to do this in some other locale. In fact, I might create some postcards with a picture of my house on front. Flip it over and it will read: We never left. We are having a wonderful time. XOXO Maura

Toddler Logic

While I was still teaching, the school librarian gave me a great piece of advice. She told me to get a journal and use it to record all those silly things that your child(ren) will say as they acquire language. She kept such a journal for her son. In it she would not only write what he said but also provide some context with which to enrich her memory. I guess instead of a journal I am using a blog, but the idea is the same- to write down all the silly memories of motherhood that somehow get lost among all the other moments. Pictures are great, and so is video, but the English teacher that I am favors the written word.

Which brings me to last Saturday. I decided to pick up some bagels for our breakfast. Alice is a big fan of bagels and cream cheese so it is always a winner of a breakfast. When she saw her plain bagel and cream cheese on her plate she shrieked, "Yeah, bagel and butt cheese!" John and I looked at each other with the same question in our eyes, "Butt cheese?" I feverishly started running a list of all the possibilities for this odd phrasing: Something she picked up in school? Is it because we are potty training? Does she just like the word "butt"? Nothing seemed right and then John hit on it- diaper rash ointment. Every night after he gives Alice a bath, she tells her he is going to put on her "butt cream". Both creams are white. In toddler logic, it makes perfect sense. Now I just have to make sure to keep the diaper cream in the kitchen out of her reach or we might have a culinary disaster on our hands.